On being spontaneous
So, let’s get something clear – I am not spontaneous.
Nope. I’m a planner. A worrier. A perseverater. Yes, I do think about what I’ll eat for breakfast when I’m 60.
The good news is – I am really good at planning. Like really good.
But, I want to be spontaneous. It seems so fun. Make plans on the whim, not worry about the details. But often, it just stresses me out. (Gah, what if I miss out on something? Or make the wrong choice? What if I can’t fit it all in?)
Traveling was good for me – and I even got more spontaneous.
I was in Kochi, in Southern India and decided it was time to move on. I wasn’t sure where to go next, though. I had places I wanted to go to, but perhaps travel fatigue was setting in and I was just tired of making decisions. As I took the ferry across to the mainland and made my way to the bus station, I weighed the options, but nothing came clear. Finally, I decided I would leave it to fate – whatever bus came next would be the one I would take. I shared a tuk-tuk with a couple, the woman and I crammed in the back with 3 packs, the man up front with the driver. She and I chatted as we careened around corners, threatening to topple with the weight of us all stuffed in. They laughed at my ‘care-free’ nature. I laughed, inwardly, at their assessment of me. We parted ways at the bus station as I jumped on the bus that was boarding at that moment, headed South. They were headed north.
I had more spontaneous adventures along the way – meeting people, following my heart, seeing the world. Learning to say yes to the unexpected.
But, back here. It’s harder. I have a job (where I plan a lot). I fall into my old trappings.
Last week was a long week. I was working at home every day, which sounds fun when you go to work every day. But invariably, it means everything takes me longer, it is very solitary and then I end up over-talking with my friends when I hang out with them because I haven’t spoken to someone all day!
So…. I decided I needed to get out of the city. Go for an adventure.
But, you know, in the good ol’ U.S. of A. it sure is hard to be spontaneous. You can’t just jump on the next combi headed out of town or way town a bus just anywhere. We have rules and tickets and no refunds. And while rules sometimes help (I can cross the street without fear of being run over) and knowing the schedule for buses is helpful (nothing worse than hearing, no, madame, that bus left. I don’t know when there will be another. maybe tomorrow), sometimes you just want to be spontaneous!
Lucky for me, I have a huge wonderful group of friends. Unlucky for me, most of them are spread out all over.
So, spur of the moment, for me, I decided to head to Boston to try to get to see at least one of them.
Boston beer-a-thon. More hours on a bus than in Boston. A coupla hours with one of my dearest friends in the world. Letting go of results and trusting that it all works out the way it’s suppose to.
So – here’s to being spontaneous, letting go and being here. now. ’cause look — you too could have a big-ass smile like this!
What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done?